Are You Feral or Domesticated?

And I ain’t talkin’ about yer dog. 

Our society has a way of pigeon-holing people based on personality traits.  We can’t help it – we want to put everything and everyone into a neat little box with a label stamped on it.  You can’t just BE, you must be SOMETHING.  Are you a Go-Getter Type A, or a more laid-back B type of person?  (My guess is that if you are taking time out of your busy day to read this, you are likely a B, or an A-/B+ at most - those A types are probably balancing their checkbook or scrubbing their baseboards right now.)

There is the Extrovert-Introvert continuum on which somewhere we all apparently reside.  When I try to place myself, though, I’m all over the map – I love to be around people, but not people I don’t know.  How does that work?  And when you add in the labels that go with those, like intuitive, sensitive, thinking and feeling, then the attempt to define ourselves gets even more fuzzy.  By the time you pair up all the possible combinations you have 16 different personalities to choose from in that model.  Just wrapping my brain around that makes me feel a bit schizophrenic myself!

The Big 5 traits are all the rage these days.  This gives us 4 more continuums on which to place ourselves.  It starts with the familiar extrovert/introvert spread, and adds agreeableness, conscientiousness, neuroticism and openness.  My head hurts just thinking about it….does that kill my “openness” score?

But it turns out that this personality thing is not so complicated after all.  I can boil all of our quirks and habits down to one simple continuum.  I call it the Feral – Domesticated continuum.  Nothing could be more simple or natural.

I selected a few definitions to begin my argument:

          1.      Domesticated: 

a. To train or adapt (human) to live in a human environment and be of use to humans.

        b. To introduce and accustom (human) into another region; naturalize.

      2.    Feral: 

a. Not domesticated or cultivated

b. Wild

Although I am talking about us humans, I’d like to introduce the idea with a comparison of the scrappy wild dog living with the pack versus the labradoodle lap-dog complete with collar, tags and up-to-date vaccinations.  The labradoodle is a natural people-pleaser, jovial, friendly and easily trained. The rewards are plentiful and frequent for the doodle, as long as she follows the rules. The wild dog survives on instinct, suspicion and reliance on the close-knit pack. And within the pack is also the safest place to sit back and howl at the moon.  The wild dog’s success depends on loyalty and defense mechanisms.

The traits of the spectrum for humans are not that different from the animals.  A fully domesticated person blends seamlessly into their environment and seems to enjoy it.  They pay attention to advertisements, shop at the malls, drive shiny cars, own and use most modern gadgets with ease.  They comfortably wear the latest fashions or professional sports jerseys and keep a tidy appearance.  Large gatherings with lots of small talk are easy for the Domesticated.  Appointments are made and kept on a regular basis.  Annual vacations are planned well in advance.  Rules are followed.

However a person closer to the Feral end of the continuum not only doesn’t always blend in, but doesn’t necessarily WANT to.  They don’t want to be sold anything and would rather be hung from the ceiling by their toenails than be trapped for an afternoon at a crowded shopping mall.  Wandering outdoors is time well spent for the Feral.  When required to sit indoors, they can be seen circling a chair before finally sitting down with back against the wall, facing out toward the window.  (And you thought you were claustrophobic….now you know, it’s just good ol’ Feral instinct!) 

The Feral is suspicious of trends and is content with what stands the test of time.  They may be very extroverted, but mostly within their own pack. Idle small talk is not a strength for the wild human. And if a stranger invades personal space or threatens some kind of trouble, the Feral will retreat, hackles up, or make an attempt to scare the invader off to a safe distance.

How about some “real life” examples from popular culture – how’s that for an oxymoron?

Take this old-fashioned example.  Those of my generation grew up watching black and white reruns on TV.  June Cleaver, of “Leave it to Beaver” was the perfect mother, wife, housekeeper, coupon-clipping shopper, etc.  She fit into her modern (for that time) environment without a hitch.  Then you had Lucy Ricardo, of “I Love Lucy” who had the same time-period role to fill, but couldn’t do it for the life of her.   She tried to be a June Cleaver, but that didn’t fit her personality so she was constantly defying her roles as wife, mother and housewife by venturing out to make trouble and then having to fix all the mistakes in her wake.  June Cleaver was perfectly domesticated and Lucy Ricardo was quite feral.

Too young to understand that comparison?  If you were alive in 2012 you should be able to relate to this:  A less archaic pop-culture example might be from The Hunger Games.  Effie Trinket is the fully domesticated Panem resident who fits seamlessly into the colorful and hedonistic culture of The Capitol. Whereas Katniss Everdeen, the Feral, is a rebellious soul who will fight against perceived injustice.  Even when Katniss is embraced by the culture of the capital, she feels uncomfortable with the fancy clothes, endless luxuries and attention.  She would rather sit out on the roof, under the open sky and stars, than “trapped” below in the luxury apartment she was given.

There are so many real-life situations that show the contrast between the ends of the Feral-Domesticated spectrum.  School?  Forget the ADD and ADHD labels.  The Domesticated are traditional students who can sit still for hours and learn from books and lecture.  The Feral child feels squirrely when confined to a small desk and needs to bounce, wiggle and chatter.  Recess is an absolute necessary for the Feral – you won’t find them begging to stay in the classroom to tidy the bookshelves.  Exercise?  The Domesticated can get what they need from a treadmill and ear buds.  Not the Feral – for them it takes mountains, trails and wind in their face to keep sweating.

So…have I successfully introduced a whole new definition to add to the personality spectrum?  Fat chance.    But a gal can have a little fun with words, eh?  Besides, this Feral understands herself a little better now.  What about you?  Are you Domesticated or Feral?