NOTE: On this day (Jan. 3) I used a writing prompt (in bold below) and found myself in a certain senator's head in this moment in time. It's not a pleasant place to be and I hope it never happens again!
Staring at his reflection felt like looking at a stranger. What had he become? He used to be the guy with an easy smile, always with a joke at the ready to put people at ease. He was the one that friends would go to for advice or to share big news. But now he was alone. Those same friends and colleagues would not return calls, and acquaintances pretended not to know him.
He tried to smile at himself in the mirror, tried to look like the jovial man he once was. But something was missing - his lips turned up at the ends like they were supposed to, and he even managed to make a dimple appear in his cheek ever-so-briefly. But the problem was his eyes. When his mouth smiled, his eyes didn’t smile. There was no shine, no lines radiating out from the corners of his eyes to match his lips. Eyes don’t lie like lips can tell lies.
He had noticed that Heidi seemed to be holding back with him. She was quiet and avoided meaningful conversation. She moved in ways to avoid his touch, even stepping to the side when passing him in the hallway. Sure, she was used to his ambition. As the good wife she had vowed to be so many years ago, she had always supported his decisions unconditionally, but this time it was too much. Around their girls she would create normalcy - family meals, small talk - but when the kids went to bed her silence became unbearably loud. “This stranger in the mirror…is this what she now sees when she looks at my face?” he wondered.
“She’ll get over it”, he murmured to his reflection. When his devoted wife questioned him on the decision to go ahead with this, he had reassured her that this was just another important step in his goal of winning the presidency in four years. From their very first date, years ago, he was honest with her about his ambition to become the leader of the free world. When she agreed to marry him, she agreed to support him the whole way, through the good AND the bad.
As he groomed his beard, he continued to rationalize his defiance, “When he made fun of your looks,” referring to his wife in the next room, “Remember that I defended you!” He and the president had a complicated relationship that had evolved over time. Even though POTUS had called him ‘Lyin’ Ted’ and accused his father of involvement in JFKs assassination, he knew that was just politics. Or at least the new politics he had embraced. And now, he needed the president, or at least he needed his fanatical followers that slurped up every lie and conspiracy their dear leader spewed.
This was just a strategy. He thought that if he repeated the president's lies about voter fraud, pushed them in Congress and put on a big show for the big boss, the president’s minions would vote for him in the next round. He knew that the effort to keep POTUS in office wouldn’t succeed, and honestly, he didn’t want it to work. Life would be easier with the loudmouth out of office. This was merely his attempt to win the affection of the 45’s base.
“It’s not lying,” he reassured his frothy face in the mirror, grumbling. “It’s just doing what I have to do, to get what I want. Calling this anti-democratic is such an exaggeration. She doesn’t know what she’s talking about.”
After plucking some rogue nose hairs, his grooming was to his satisfaction. He once again tried to put on a friendly face. This time he chose an open-mouth smile to showcase his white teeth. His mouth widened and his lips again turned up at the corners. But the eyes, rather than showing a twinkle of optimism, revealed a dull deadness. He remembered that old saying about how the eyes are the window to the soul. For a brief moment, he felt the hair raise on the back of his neck and his shoulders trembled in an involuntary shiver.
He shrugged it off, inhaled deeply and exclaimed to his reflection loud enough for his wife to hear the in next room, “You’ll see. I’m not being foolish. This will all be worth it when we’re in the White House. You’ll see…”
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